A Review of The Ambassador Hotel in Panama City Beach

Welcome to the Ambassador. Feel free to use our shitty parking lot.

Recently, I stripped for a bachelorette party at the Ambassador hotel in Panama City Beach, Florida. The girls ranged from 18 to 22 years old, and they were an awesome group. On the other hand, the hotel they rented was a cesspool of filth.

View from the back. Looks can be deceiving.

The outer appearance looked like a nice beach resort, but the inside hid a different story. The black couch in the living room had what appeared to be several dried semen stains on the cushions. I suggested laying a blanket over it, but even that was covered in dried yellowish splatter stains. The carpet looked like it hadn't been cleaned in years. The girls complained that the bottoms of their feet turned black from walking on it. They also griped about the bathroom, which looked like an ideal environment for mold.

Obviously, many other travelers had similar complaints. Check out the pics and reviews on this website or on tripadvisor.com. Read the one-star reviews because those accurately reflect what I had experienced.

The only saving grace of this establish is the view of the beach and easy access to the nightlife of Panama City Beach because it's located on Front Beach Road. The proximity of the nightlife may be a detriment to those of you who prefer peace and quiet. As I was entering and leaving the party, I saw several drunks stagger through the parking lot yelling salacious remarks at random women. I even had to escort one of the girls from the bachelorette party to her cab just so the other drunks would leave her alone.

Only stay at this place if you're a teenager or college student who wants to party along the beach and cannot afford anything nicer (and you don't mind dried semen all over your furniture and blankets). Otherwise, your partying neighbors will guarantee sleepless night full of loud music and drunken screaming for you and your family. At least you can work on your tan and swim.

If you're looking for a nice getaway at the beach, there are plenty of other options out there besides this dump.

Final Verdict: One out of five stars.