7 Unattractive Traits that Women Find in Men

After working over a decade in the industry I’ve picked up a few things that women tend to like and dislike in men. If you're one of those guys out there having trouble getting a girlfriend or snagging a date, then you probably carry at least one of the traits listed below:

Unattractive Male Trait 1: Insecurity

Insecurity encompasses several things: a need to prove oneself, irrational jealousy, or a constant desire to be over-protective. Each one can turn a girl off faster than a wet fart during oral sex. 

If you feel the need to wrap your arms around her each time another man looks in her direction, then chances are that you're insecure. If you feel the need to interrogate her for greeting the grocery store clerk, then chances are that you're insecure. If you feel the need to demonstrate how much superior you are to other men around her, then chances are that you're insecure.

So relax. You cannot control everything. Just be in control of yourself.

Unattractive Male Trait 2: Boring Personality

Counteract this with a sense of humor. Women love men who make them laugh. A man who can laugh with his friends often looks like a fun person to be around. No one wants to hang around those who are always so serious and uptight.

Unattractive Male Trait 3: Bragging

So you make a lot of money, drive a fancy car, lift more than everyone at the gym, and date supermodels… and you must tell the whole world. Impress them with your wealth, power, and achievements. Guess what? Most people will nod along politely, but they really don't care (unless they're after your money). 

The more you brag about how much you have, the more she shakes her head and rolls her eyes in disgust, especially when you’re too busy talking about yourself to ask about her. Employ some modesty and use your time to get to know her. If you really are a great catch, have loads of money, a nice house, and a great job, then she can ask about it on her own if she's interested in you. You don't need to bore her ears off with your boasting. Just remember: bragging is another way for men to conceal their boring personalities and insecurities.

Unattractive Male Trait 4: Not Taking Care of Oneself

Women like men who smell good and take care of themselves. If you resemble an obese slob who never uses deodorant and wears tattered clothes, then you’re probably not going to find a date.

"But, but... What about my awesome personality?" you say. 

What about it? Do you think that beautiful woman who spends all that time putting on makeup, doing her hair, getting her nails done, and applying lotion all over her skin so it's silky smooth wants a man who doesn’t give a shit about his appearance and hygiene? You don’t have to be a Calvin Klein underwear model, but it doesn’t hurt to exercise and maintain proper hygiene.

The same applies for your household habits. Nothing screams “disgusting” to a woman than a man who leaves his dirty socks, underwear, and dinner plates scattered about his living quarters. Clean up after yourself, because you're not going to attract any women if you dwell in a pig sty.

Unattractive Male Trait 5: Lack of Proper Etiquette

You don't need to show up on a white horse dressed as a knight, but acting as a gentleman won't hurt once in a while. Open the door for her when you're out on a date. If she's carrying something heavy, offer to carry it in her stead. Don't let her walk back to her car alone through that dark alley. 

Women like to feel safe and respected, not ditched and neglected.

Unattractive Male Trait 6: No Ambition

Most women are attracted to men who have a passion in life about goals, ideas, and things to achieve. These things can center around hobbies, activities, your job, or projects at home. Either way, you should be a constant work in progress.

Women find men who have no drive or motivation to be repulsive. So for those of you who are unemployed and sitting at your parents' house playing video games all day, you might want to get up off your ass and do something productive. Otherwise, you'd better get used to watching porn the rest of your life.


Unattractive Male Trait 7: The Ungenuine Nice Guy

You're only nice to that girl because you want her. You sacrifice your self-worth in order to please her. You buy her gifts and attend to her every need. Yet, whenever she dates another man instead of you, you become furious and spiteful. 

The kindness of the Ungenuine Nice Guy is conditional, extending only to the object of his desire at that current moment. This trait is not only unattractive to most women, but it puts them on their guard. Moreover, this is a very unhealthy approach to dating because it involves placing your happiness in someone else.

 It's great to be nice as long as it's authentic and you don't act like a doormat in the process. 

Getting Laid 2 - Attitude

In Getting Laid - Physical Appearance , I elaborated that a man with a good appearance can pass the first step in attracting a girl. The second step is attitude. Even the best looking man in the club can fail with women if his attitude is lacking. On the other hand, an average man with the right attitude can compensate for looks, and even excel over the good looking man. Therefore, the right attitude is a necessity for attracting women.

Unfortunately, this second step is where most men fail. From my observations, most men are really fucking stupid when it comes to having the right attitude. That is why 10% of the male population are fucking 90% of the females. Only 10% have the right attitude while the rest of the 90% are stuck fighting for the scraps. Fortunately for most of these unlucky 90%, you can change attitude over time much easier than you can change looks.

First, let's elaborate on what men and women value:

- For men, the goods are sex. Women who give out this commodity too easily are low-quality women. In other words, few men want to settle down with a "whore" or "slut."

- For women, the goods are affection. Men who give out this commodity too easily are low-quality men. Got that? Being too affectionate from the beginning is the downfall of many men. Women label such men as "saps" or "pussies."

Call me sexist or whatever, but I've noticed that this observation remains constant with the majority of people. Ever wonder why a man-whore gets by better than a slutty girl? Have you noticed that affectionate women fare much better than affectionate men? Yes, it's a double-standard, but it's reality. If you don't like it, then tough shit.

I notice a large amount of overly-affectionate men everywhere I go, especially when it comes to college-aged men. I don't know where they learn to act like pussies; perhaps their moms or other women taught them "how to act" around women. Maybe they watched a lot of movies---such as Scott Pilgrim, Superbad, Revenge of the Nerds, and American Pie---where the pussy protagonist(s) uses his sensitive personality to woo the hot chick at the end of the movie. If you believe in this horseshit, then I've got news for you: Wake up to reality. This ain't Hollywood with a happy ending.

Okay, maybe that's too harsh. You can still act like a pussy and get girls. Emo boys manage to do it once a blue moon. However, acting like a man will benefit you much more in the long run. The question is: How does one act like a man? Most guys think they act like men, but only a few actually do. Remember, it's usually 10% of the men that fuck 90% of the women. Just imagine how many of the other 90% of the male population out there think that they're men... Not so much as they think!

I'm going to give advice that probably seems basic, yet eludes some people out there. First off, here's what not to do:

1.) Fall in love too quickly (in 3 weeks) - Don't do this. You can't truly love someone after knowing them for 2 or 3 weeks. Real love takes awhile. In the situation that you are a sap and fall in love after a week, do yourself a favor and keep that shit to yourself for another few months in the very least. Love in a relationship should be mutual, not one-sided. To remedy this, let a woman show her affection to you first--not the other way around. Once she makes the first step, then you're in.

2.) Eager to impress - So you have a Lotus, a Ducati, a great job, loads of connections, the best clothes/jewelry that money can buy, and all that good shit. Do yourself another favor: Keep it to yourself. If you talk about this shit, then you are bragging, and women will know it right away. And do you know what women label bragging men as? Insecure. That's right. While your buddies may say "Wow dude--you got a Lotus," women will assume that you're insecure. There are a few girls who are impressed by such things, but these women are just as shallow as you are, so expect to be used for your money.

Bragging comes in other forms too. You can brag about how tough you are and how many fights you won, or how you are good friends with the police chief, or how many people think you're cool. Well, if you have to brag about it, then chances are, you're trying to impress. Don't do it. If you really are all that, then a girl will know that through your actions and body language, not words.

3.) Putting on a Front - This is similar to #2. Ever noticed how someone tries to act like something they're not? For instance, take a boy who grew up in the suburbs, but dresses like he's a thug and tells everyone how rough he had it growing up. Seriously? Don't fucking do this.

4.) Trying to compete with other men - Some women like men fighting over them. Don't do this either. I knew one girl who loved having legions of men compete for her affections. When I hung out with her, she would flirt with me like she did with all of her other "guy friends." I would act nonchalant, sometimes flirting, but sometimes not. Then I would talk to other girls. This actually made her jealous. Instead of me competing for her affections, she was competing for mine. I could have slept with her, but instead, I fucked one of her friends who was a lot hotter. Anyway, point of the story---don't compete. Competing is the same as trying too hard to impress. If you're trying to impress a girl too much, then she knows that she has you. And if a girl knows that she has you, then you're too easy.

Well, there is my advice. It's not perfect. It's not guaranteed to get you laid. Yet, if you need some improvements on your game, then maybe some of the points I covered can help. I'll add more to this list as time goes on and I think of something else. Feel free to comment below if you have questions or something that you want to add.

Remember: Attitude and physical appearance goes a long well. If you have these two areas covered, then you're set.

How to Spot a Cheating Whore

Here was an interesting question posted by Anonymous regarding the following stories: Secrets That Women Keep

Have you ever regreted sleeping with any girls that you knew were getting married soon or had boyfriends? You know...kinda out of pity/or feeling bad knowing that he is about to marry this cheater/cumdumpster?

I feel bad for the guys who are marrying or dating such girls. However, these guys are a bit too trusting of their girlfriends, especially when these girls exhibit transparent behavior when cheating. I'll list the cheating girl's top 3 tactics below:

3. Girl ignores texts and phone calls - The cheater will do this while she's "having fun." Afterward, she'll return the call and make up some excuse about how "busy" she was. While a man can't expect his significant other to answer at all times, he can expect that such repetitive behavior shows that she has something better to do with her time...unless the guy is clingy and calls too much.

2. "You're jealous/controlling" - Some women have reason to say such a statement. Some men are jealous and controlling for no good reason. But I've noticed that a lot of women who cheat tend to pull out the "you're controlling" card when their boyfriends confront them on their bullshit. Since every reasonable guy wants to avoid the "jealous" and "controlling" label, he'll instantly become defensive. That's what the cheating girl wants, because now that the guy is busy defending himself, she has successfully diverted the attention away from her bad behavior.

Therefore, this accusation becomes a diversion tactic when the cheater has no real explanation to provide.

1. Sweet talk to cover up something bad - This is the number one downfall for most men, and a tactic that is used often.

During one instance, A girl pulled me away from the party and into a bedroom. She gave me a blowjob for about minute until she felt bad and stopped. I didn't know why. She just mumbled an apology to me and left the bedroom. When I went back to the living room, I heard this girl on the phone with her boyfriend telling him how "wonderful" he was, and how she "loved him to pieces." He fell for it. I was surprised myself, because she never told me that she had a boyfriend.


Overall, I feel bad for honest folks who fall for cheaters. It happens a lot, but the warning signs are often there. For those of you dating a possible cheater, but isn't sure, then I hope this list helps.

Long E-mail About a Male Stripper

Hey Dion, I just checked out your blog and its really cool. Just thought that i should let you know. I dont have any questions about your profession yet, but i kinda have a bit of a personal situation going on here and you are the perfect guy to ask for an advice,because you are a male stripper and you know how things work!:))) Hopefully you dont mind my question and I hear back from you:))
First of all my name is Mindy and I am 23 years old. I dont know where in the usa you are at,but I am from Buffalo ,but just moved with my sister to Bensenville, Illinois about 6 months ago.

Alright..long story short..a few months ago I went to a male strip club(it was my sister's birthday) and one of the dancers was really nice to me,he was talking to me so many times that night. I did have a couple of private dances with him and he kissed me on the lips and I mean a french kiss and he said that i turn him on every time.Anyways as i was leaving he told me that i know where to find him and i should go again. 2 months later I went there again and he remembered me. Again he was talking to me a lot, he said that im so cute.Later on that night he came and he grabed my hand and took me to their private room again for a dance and he kissed me again. When the dance was done he just said that i look so good. When i was leaving i went to him to say bye and he told me to ask about him at the door next time Im there and he'll get me in for free.

Anyways he never asked me for my number or anything like that, but he acts like he likes me. I was there twice and each time I got a lot of attention from him and we kissed - twice, and always says how cute I am. I even said to him that he just says that I am cute and I look good,because its his job and he needs to be flirty,but he said that thats not true and he doesnt need to say shi* if he doesnt want to.
I have a promise ring on my ring finger, that looks like an engagement ring, and I dont know if he has seen it and thats the reason why he is not trying to ask me out, or if its just because he is that good of a player and knows how to get me back there:)
By the way me and my boyfriend are taking a break right now and I dont even know why I still wear the ring.

Im so sorry for the long email. Please, let me know what do you think.Im so confused.I feel silly for emailing you,but no one else is going to give me an honest advice. My sister is all so convinced that he likes me and I do think that too,but at the same time I think he is justg having fun and playing around. I know that you know exactly how he thinks and how things work.Should I go there again? and if I go should I be more aggressive with him..I just dont want to ask him out as it looks so desperate:))

Okay, you asked for advice and I'm brutally honest about giving it, so here goes:

I know you like this guy, but he's probably not the type you would want to pursue.

Of course, he's taken an interest in you, but only the same kind of interest that he takes in the other girls he allows in for free. I guarantee that he has at least several lined up. I worked at one club and I used to do the same thing: Get a girl in for free because I wanted to fuck her---the potential list was long.

I'm also willing to bet that he's charming and gregarious too. As far as pursuing something with him, only do so if you don't mind sharing him with a dozen other girls. He *will* cheat on you.

As far as a sexual fling goes, I highly discourage it as well based off the exposure that some of these guys get. For instance, if I really tried to get laid with every opportunity that came my way, then I would've slept with at least 200 girls by now.

About the ring, here are two possibilities: 1.) He has noticed it and doesn't care, because he only wants to screw regardless if you're taken or not; 2.) he hasn't noticed, because he simply doesn't care enough to see if you're single or not. The ring is one of the first things I notice if I have taken an interest in someone.

Another red flag is the fact that he only comments on your looks, because that's all he's after. If he really liked you, then he would pay some heed to your personality. From what you have told me, he hasn't.

I've probably shot myself in the leg by giving this advice, but it's reality. So with that said, would you like to hire me for a party? I'll give you a good discount.

Being Friends With Exes = Retarded

Apparently, my male-stripping profession makes me some type of relationship guru. I've received several e-mails asking what type of girls to look for and what type to avoid. Answering each one of these e-mails privately has become quite time consuming, so I'm going to post my common advice.

Some of this advice can apply to the female readers as well, unless it's otherwise obvious.

For today, I'm going to focus on the disqualifying factors for a relationship. You don't need to date someone if he or she is associated with any of the qualities below:

1.) Friends with exes (or former fuck buddies).

In this day and age, the concept of remaining friends with exes has become quite common. No wonder the divorce rate steadily climbs higher. Never ever commit to someone who's determined to remain friends with an ex. Staying friends with exes (or fuck buddies) while investing in a new relationship is both inappropriate and unfair to your new partner. I strongly advise against dating people who can't let go of their past.

2.) "I need romance (in order to have sex with you)."

Guys, if a girl ever tells you this load of bullshit, then she's just not attracted to you anymore. Therefore, she needs romance as a substitute for attraction to have sex with you. Keep this in mind: Women never need romance for one-night stands. The girl who went to the club, got drunk, and hooked up with a random stranger was just craving a dick. So if your girl has ever had a one-night stand, but demands romance out of you, then I suggest you find a different girl.

Or the flip side to this:

3.) "I watch too much porn."

Ladies, if your man rarely fucks you, but always masturbates to porn, then he's just not attracted to you. Don't get me wrong, porn is great in moderate amounts---I'm a huge fan of it. But a man is living in a fantasy when he forgoes actual pussy for his favorite Internet porn star video.

Men, think of it like this: Your favorite porn fantasies are the equivalent of some women's favorite romance novel fantasies. The absurdity of you becoming the exotic prince of her romantic desires is tantamount to your woman taking a rough anal pounding and finishing you off with a blowjob while enjoying every bit of it. It's not likely to happen...unless your woman is into that kind of thing already.

4.) "I have trust issues, because my ex..."

If you're an honest person, then why do you have to pay for something that someone else has done in the past? For instance, just because someones ex cheated on him/her, doesn't mean you will. People with trust issues will treat you as if you will either lie, cheat, or stab them in the back.

I'm not advocating that you have to trust someone with complete and utter devotion from day one. Trust is earned, not dictated. What I'm saying is that your partner shouldn't place unfair accusations and suspicions on you because someone fucked him/her over in the past.

5.) Random psychological issues

I'll start this with a personal example.

When I was 23, I was fucking this hot blonde on a regular basis. After only a week of knowing her, she told me that her uncle used to molest her. I was pissed---not at her uncle, but at her. Whether or not her story was true, she was seeking attention. Even if it were true, why would she give out this information to someone she has only known for a damn week!?

She became angry when I didn't give her the typical sympathetic response. What did she want me to do about it? Beat the shit out of her uncle? Pat her on the back and offer to take care of her? Basically, her sob story about her uncle was only the prelude to other dramatic experiences in her life. I told her that she needed to resolve her problems on her own, or seek professional help---not unload it all on me. I soon cut contact with her, because she would have dragged me into her mess of a life story.

The moral of this story is to avoid dating anyone with deep psychological issues. Unless you want to act as a free therapist 24/7, I recommend dating someone who is normal. Therefore, your relationship starts out without any problems and you don't have to fix anything. Trying to become a savior for a self-destructive person will only result in a destructive lifestyle for yourself because you'll be carrying the weight of their emotional burden.

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Well, there you have it. Those are the negative qualities to avoid in prospective partners. Follow this advice and you'll weed out a lot of potential drama in future relationships.