Tuesday, March 24, 2015

7 Ways "Magic Mike" Affected the Industry

I’ve been a male stripper since 2003. That makes twelve good years I have seen the industry evolve. I watched companies drop phonebook advertisements and switch to online marketing. Smartphones and Google maps replaced road atlases and customer directions. Smartphones phased out the bulky camcorder and disposable cameras, making pictures and videos much more prevalent than they used to be. Despite all these things, one thing also affected the industry: “Magic Mike.”

Let’s face it. “Magic Mike” was a horrible movie, bearing the combination of a weak plot, horrible acting, and little character development. Nonetheless, it brought the male stripping industry into the mainstream spotlight.

Here are some things that have changed:

#7) Make it Rain

The term “make it rain” has been around for a few years before the movie, and it means to throw a wad of cash into the air to mimic the effect of money raining down (for those of you who don’t know). However, ever since the movie came out, girls want to get pics and videos of money raining down on the stripper. This never happened early on in my career, but it’s a staple at almost every party now.

#6) Music

Many customers request songs such as “Pony” by Genuwine, or other songs that appeared in the movie. I assume that when the sequel “Magic Mike XXL” arrives, that soundtrack will play a crucial role in future revues.

#5) Dance Moves

Male strippers who work private parties usually focus on dynamic activities instead of a choreographed dance routine (excluding black male dancer shows). Some girls who have watched the movie sometimes expect the stripper to pull off the same acrobatic flips and twists in their living room as Channing Tatum in the movie. While some male strippers have a good repertoire of moves, they’re probably not going to vault around the coffee table, kicking over drinks and random furniture in the process.

#4) Stereotypes

The move dispelled some common myths about strippers, but also created new ones. For instance, fewer women ask me if I’m “gay” thanks to the movie. I don’t know where they associated why a gay man would enjoy stripping (nude in some cases) for a crowd of women. Wouldn’t they prefer to work at a gay strip club? Well, that question has become less frequent now.

However, the movie introduced a cast of strippers who lived hedonistic lifestyles full of drugs and irresponsibility, except the main character and his employer. Unfortunately, some girls think this carries over in the real world and think that I’m going to drop a line of coke on their coffee table and snort it. While it’s true that some male strippers bear drug problems and live hand-to-mouth, many successful strippers work full time jobs, have great careers, and live healthy lifestyles. The movie didn’t highlight this type of stripper so much.

#3) More Male Applicants

Many guys, after watching the movie, realize that stripping for a bunch of eager young ladies seems like a dream-come-true. Who doesn’t want to feel like the only desired guy at a club full of women? Therefore, the amount of applicants surged in recent years. Unfortunately, most of them have never looked into a mirror before.

#2) Sexuality

Maybe this is just from my person experience, but I’ve noticed more and more girls getting a sexual thrill from these strip shows than ever before. When I first started, women just wanted to embarrass their friends and have a few laughs. While that hasn’t changed, there are more requests for nudity than ever before. Some crowds even want me to cum in front of them.

I don’t know if this is situational with my growing experience and show quality, or if male stripping is becoming more mainstream and desirable. That leads to the next point…

#1) Popularity

Since the release of the movie, there has been a surge in bookings across the nation. The movie was a hit, and many of my customers cite “Magic Mike” as their reasoning for booking a stripper, because they want to enact that experience in person.

Overall, I’d say the movie has a general positive effect on male strippers in general. Those of us in the industry can iron out the stereotypes and run the shows our way in the end. I hope the sequel ushers in more response and garners more bookings for the industry when it’s released this summer.

Friday, March 20, 2015

Party Log: Spring Break 2015 - Part Two

Continued from Part One

March 14, 2015

Bachelorette party in Orange Beach, Alabama. Six girls.

This party set the standard for a "usual work day" as a male stripper. I performed, the girls had a good time, and nothing too crazy happened. Everyone left happy.

However, I did get a pic of their blowup doll:

The ladies put whip cream on him to simulated a cumshot, but added the lemon to his mouth after taking body shots from me, because they chased the shots by taking the lemon from my mouth. I was flattered.

March 15, 2015

Orange Beach, Alabama. Birthday party. 30 people at a luxurious bay condo.

Everyone here came from Moldova, which is in eastern Europe for those who are poor at geography. This party was much different than usual, and I attribute that to several factors, including cultural differences.

First off, the husbands were present. Some of them even pitched in money to pay for me, including the husband of the birthday girl. Second, their kids were there. I had to wait until 10 pm to show up, because they had to put the kids to bed first.

I showed up in my cop outfit and told the party they were being too loud, deceiving the birthday girl completely. As soon as I stripped, she became embarrassed even though she was very drunk. I couldn't imagine how she would've reacted if she were sober.

The cultural difference became evident when no one tipped. I didn't really mind. Everyone treated me well. Instead, it felt odd dancing for the birthday girl with thirty strangers watching. I also discovered why some of the married guys chipped in money. A few of them eyed me with hungrily, and one of the wives mentioned her husband was "bisexual."

Next, the little children woke up and began running through the living room. That was a first in my career. No one seemed to care. One girl carried a toddler into the living room, and he stared at me in awe. Maybe it's just me, but dancing in my underwear in front of a bunch of little children just didn't seem right. I decided to end it there, after working for only twenty minutes.

I donned on my cop outfit, posed for pictures, and went to my car. Before I drove off, I changed shirts, because I NEVER drive wearing the uniform. It was good timing too, because as soon as backed out of the driveway, the real cops arrived. An angry neighbor called the cops because the music was too loud. Such irony...

March 19, 2015

Biloxi, Mississippi. Bachelorette party.

Unfortunately, I had to turn this one down due to my real job. I asked my agent if the girls would postpone until Friday, but they couldn't because they were only in Biloxi for one night.

So far, this is the only show I turned down this year.

Sunday, March 15, 2015

Party Log: Spring 2015 - Part One

Spring is here. At least it is in the deep South where it's warm enough to walk outside in a swimsuit during the day. Along with the warm weather comes tourists and bachelorette parties in droves. Some of the locals at the beaches hate them, but they bring their money into the local economy and spend it on things like male strippers (me!).

Below is a quick summary of some of the recent parties:

February 28, 2015

Three girls--very close friends, obviously--hired me for one of the smallest bachelorette parties of my career. In my experience, smaller groups tend to participate more... intimately. It's because the girls are the best of friends and lack the numerous clicks involved in larger crowds.

These girls were such great friends that two of them swapped their husbands with each other. They were in their mid-twenties, attractive, and well-off. People become kinkier with age, so I wonder what kind of crazy shit they'll do in their forties.

The carefree nature of this group put me on fire. I went completely nude and masturbated in front of them. Before I arrived, they played a game where they tossed inflatable rings on an inflatable penis. We simply switched the inflatable penis out with the real thing.

I wish every party played out like this. This ended up being one of my better performances. Here's a pic from the party:

March 7, 2015

A bachelorette party in Destin.

The customer who paid me looked exceptionally gorgeous. Her blonde hair flowed down her back. Breast implants nearly burst from her black one-piece dress that hugged her petite hourglass figure. She wore black thigh-high boots that nearly covered too much of her tanned legs. She told me that her husband used to be a male stripper. I didn't get a chance to ask her much about it, though.

This group acted more conservatively due to several mothers being present, but a few caressed the front bulge of my thong for fun. In the end, they cheerfully went along with my performance and tipped around two-hundred dollars. One of the mothers offered to give me an extra hundred dollars, but she drunkenly passed out in a chair before making good on her word.

March 13, 2015

Birthday party in a residential home.

This party marked the first time I dressed in a Superman outfit. The customer had no particular reason for the request other than she thought "it'd be cool."

Out of sheer coincidence, I own a Superman costume made out of latex. I bought it to wear for cosplay conventions such as Dragon Con or Comic Con. Unfortunately, I never got a chance to do so because of my work schedule, and inability to book a hotel room a year in advance. As a result, the costume sat in my closet in a bag for several years. This party somewhat justified my expensive purchase. Now if several more parties request Superman, the costume will earn enough to cover its cost.

For those who are curious, that's a tube of Apple-tini sticking up from the top. The birthday girl sucked it out after this picture was taken.

After the party, I quickly changed underwear. Latex clings tightly to your body like a second skin, and it compresses things (such as your cock and balls) more effectively than spandex compression shorts. Customers also have difficulty pulling it out to slip money inside. Luckily, the yellow belt I wore held money rather well, so that circumvented the tipping problem. Nonetheless, I DO NOT recommend that male strippers wear latex underwear for strip shows.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

Critiquing Applicants - Part 4

Spring break is upon us. Women use this time to travel out of town and throw bachelorette parties and weddings. Therefore, entertainment companies are hiring dancers in droves to keep up with the demand. Let's take a look at the newest batch of applicants.

Bending over to take it in the bum.
Male Stripper Applicant #11

Stage Name: Panty Boy

This applicant didn't follow directions and provide any information about himself. He simply wrote, "Can I get some lessons?" Not very fucking profession, if you ask me. When applying for a job, you should give a brief introduction and why you're the right person for the position. However, he did attach three pictures. So let's critique two of them.

First, he has no visible abs and... What the fuck? Is he wearing a pair of girl panties in the picture below?! Bwahahahhahaha! Notice the frilly white trim on blue. The bachelorette party would be in stitches over that! Why in the hell did you choose to wear panties out of all things when applying?

The New Novelty: Women's Panties

I cannot post the third picture because it depicts Panty Boy's erect penis. The company's employment section specifically states, "We DO NOT require nude photos. Men, do not send us pictures of your penis." Way to follow directions there, Panty Boy. 

In his penis photo, he is wearing a wedding ring. Does his wife know that he's applying to become a male stripper? Did she provide him her panties, or did he swipe them without her knowing?

Anyway, beyond the glaring obvious problems -- such as the lack of face pics, muscularity, costumes, experience, and other essential information -- Panty Boy cannot follow simple instructions, which is grounds for instant disqualification. That's very important in a job, you know.

Final Verdict: Rejected

"Attributes include pack and many tattoos."
Male Stripper Applicant #12

Stage Name: Crane

Our next person had a little more tact, and even opened up with a short introduction:

"Hello, My name is Crane (Name altered) and I am very interested in being a male exotic dancer. I am 21 years old, body type slim but toned, tattooed, black and brazilian ethnicity.Attributes include pack and many tattoos."

Okay, compared to some of these other guys, that's not a bad opening, but once again, he did not follow the company's employment instructions. He was supposed to include other crucial items such as a phone number, years of experience, costumes owned, etc. Unfortunately, Crane's best attribute was this e-mail.

Crane only attached one pic, which limits the scope of a good critique, but was sufficient in this case. He wasn't kidding when he mentioned being thin. An average-sized woman could snap him in two. As for facial aesthetics, he cannot justify charging customers an average of $200 an hour, either. Will Smith and Denzel Washington, he is not.

In the last sentence of his e-mail, he claims his attributes are his "pack and many tattoos." For those of you who aren't native English speakers, "pack" means a "six-pack" or visible abdominal muscles. Since that's his attribute, he should've sent a pic showing it off instead of wearing a shirt, although that wouldn't have helped his chances much. 

Finally, tattoos are not an attribute for male strippers. Period. You're not going to get hired just because you got inked up several times. He should've spent that time in the gym, instead.

Final Verdict: Rejected

Nice double-chin!
Male Stripper Applicant #13

Stage Name: Geezer

Have you ever seen an older guy, around fifty years old, attempt to flirt with a twenty-year-old girl, and wondered what the hell that old man was thinking? Or perhaps you've met an old pervert who needed to hang up the player game and retire. Everyone knows someone like that. This e-mail gives a perfect example:

Attached find several pics of me.  I'm a young 47, 7" cock, little bit of a belly, Married to an escort  http://(call-girl website link removed)  I do all her bookings so, I get it and thought why don"t I do it,

Sounds great your more than welcome to come to our home in (location removed).
Thanks and I look forward to your reply.
Geezer (actual name changed)

All right. There are many problems here, and I don't know where to start. First off, 47 years old is not "young." Now it's possible to work as a male stripper at 47, given that you still look good and have a great physique. For instance, Ian Ziering worked for the Chippendales at the ripe age of 50. I'm sad to inform you that Geezer here is no Ian Ziering.

"I'm a young 47"
In addition to the pictures you see here, Geezer attached some explicit pictures of his penis, which I cannot post. In fact, he uploaded a total of eight pictures, half of them displaying his penis at various angles. The company he applied for specifically stated, "No penis pictures." Booking agents don't want to see your junk, Geezer. On top of that, Geezer lied about his size -- he's not even close to seven inches. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to pour some rubbing alcohol in my eyes and give myself a concussion to purge my mind of these images...

Geezer also uploaded a pic of himself penetrating his escort wife. I just have to shake my head and wonder: How the hell does he think that a picture of him screwing his wife is going to get him hired? Is he trying to announce, "Look here! Some girl is having sex with me, so I'm definitely desirable!" Learn to follow instructions, Geezer. You're old enough to know how to read.

Beyond the "bit of belly," the lack of muscularity, and the other glaring obvious traits, you're just not marketable, Geezer. Most of the clientele are girls in their twenties. They don't want to hire an out-of-shape guy who's the same age as their fathers. Just because you had 47 years to cultivate your pick-up artist skills doesn't mean that girls are lining up to worship your body.

Final Verdict: Rejected.

On a side note, I went to Geezer's wife's escort website and discovered that she wasn't bad. She appeared much younger and had a decent body. She charges a minimum of $500 an hour for outcalls, though, which I think is outrageous. For that much money, I'll take my business to Europe should I ever need an escort, thank you. Then again, meeting people on apps like Tinder is free.