Monday, April 1, 2013

I Impregnated a Bachelorette

***EDIT: This story is an April's Fools joke. It never happened.***

My luck has just run out, and now I have to face the consequences. 

Back in February, I did a bachelorette party and fucked the bachorlette afterwards. I'll call her Kayla.

Anyway, Kayla and her friends invited me out to the club after my strip show, which only lasted 30 minutes. Once at the club, I danced a lot with Kayla and we both got drunk.

We all stayed at the club until last call, then went back to the condo. Kayla offered to walk me to my car and that was where we started making out. Then we took it further... Inside my car, of all places.

Neither of us had a condom and were too drunk to care. Well, I ended up cumming inside of her. I warned her that I was cumming, but she didn't hop off, and I figured she was on the pill.

After we fucked, she went back to the condo. I haven't heard from her since... Until yesterday.

She called me up and told me that she was pregnant. She took three tests---all came back positive. She said it HAS to be mine, because her fiance was a contractor in Afghanistan and the only person who has had sex with her during that time frame was me. She said she was absolutely going to keep the baby.

I asked her if she told her fiance, and she said, "No."

This whole situation has really thrown me for a loop. I'm not sure what to do now...



  1. How is he not going to tell her fiancee, if the only one in that time frame was you?

    If she is willing to make a cover story, my advice is, let them take care of it.

    If she demands any responsability, take a DNA test. God knows if she is also lying to you.

  2. Bit of a dick move..

  3. Sorry to hear about your bad luck. Perhaps, it's bit yours.... I mean if she got down with you on day one, there might be some other dudes that have been there too. Btw, been reading your blog several months and enjoy the stories. Best of luck

  4. Wow man thats crazy

  5. fuck man! you should have a taken precaution .after all this year of experience it was the least thing one can expect from you. what you gonna do boy? its some deep shit.i will pray for you.

  6. Have to ask.... is this an April Fool´s joke on us readers ?

  7. Nice try... but it's an April's Fool right? ;)

  8. I'm assuming this was an April Fools :)

  9. April fools...hope so.


  10. Lol, got me. Nice one!

    I was gonna say, before you freak out at least you could be on Maury!

  11. Ha ha. Food for thought though - what would you do? Moreover, the fiancee is a "contractor" in the desert. Unless he was on food prep, you would have two big problems.

  12. Fooled a lot of people with this one, Dion ! LoL

    I am sure it has happened to another stripper or 2 during their careers though...

  13. Dam suxs man 👎👎.making sure get dna done asap ok