Thursday, September 2, 2010

Mississippi Party

I had to drive all the way to Mississippi to strip at a bachelorette party last weekend. I wore my cop outfit. The girl who hired me told me that I was not supposed to touch the bachelorette at all, because the bachelorette's soon-to-be husband was paying for me and he didn't want me touching his woman. This was the first time I heard such a request. My shows usually involve various levels of interaction. So basically, I was supposed to strip and dance...nothing more.

I arrived in my cop outfit. The whole party consisted of a few girls in their twenties, along with their mothers. I think the presence of the mothers ruined the atmosphere, because everything felt awkward. There was little talking, and everyone watched me with a stonefaced expression. I felt awkward.

I stripped, danced, and shook my ass in front of a few girls who seemed terrified of me. Next, the girls tied up a penis pinata to the ceiling. I lent them my police baton so they could bash open the pinata. Whenever a girl had her turn to strike at the pinata, I would place a blindfold on her and spin her in circles. Eventually, the bachelorette succeeded in breaking the penis pinata open, causing its contents of condoms and candy to spill out everywhere.

The girls hardly spoke with me throughout the party, which is rare, because most women ask me loads of questions. I thought they hated my presence. They packed a small bag full of candy and condoms for me to take home though.

Several days later, the girl who hired me sent me this surprise text message: "Just wanted to say thanks again for Saturday. They had a blast!"

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